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Subject: "A West
Virginian" ......THIS IS SOOOOO
TRUE
"A
West Virginian"
Only
a West Virginian knows the difference
between a hissie fit and a conniption fit,
and that you don't HAVE them, you PITCH
them.
_____
Only
a West virginian knows how many fish,
greens, peas, beans, etc., make up a
"mess."
____
Only
a West Virginian can show or point out to
you the general direction of
"yonder."
_____
Only
a West Virginian knows exactly how long
"directly" is -- as in: Going to
town, be back directly.
_____
Even
West Virginian babies know that "Gimme
some sugar" is not a request for the
white, granular, sweet substance that sits
in a pretty little bowl in the middle of
the table.
_____
All
West
virginians know exactly when
"by and by" is. They might not
use the term, but they know the concept
well.
____
Only
a West virginian knows instinctively that
the best gesture of solace for a neighbor
who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried
chicken and a big bowl of cold potato
salad. If the neighbor's trouble is
a real crisis, they also know to add a
large banana puddin'!
_____
Only
West virginians grow up knowing the
difference between a "right
near" and a "right far
piece." They also know that
"just down the road" can be one
mile or 20.
_____
Only
a West virginian knows and understands,
the difference between a
"redneck," and a "good ol'
boy'.
_____
No
true
West Virginian would ever assume
that the car with the flashing turn signal
is actually going to make a turn.
_____
A
West Virginian knows that "fixin'"
can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
adverb.
_____
Only
West Virginians make friends while
standing in lines. We don't do queues, we
do lines, and when we're in line, we talk
to ever'body!
_____
Put
100 West Virginians in a room and half of
them will discover they're related, even
if only by marriage.
_____
West
Virginians never refer to one person as
"ya'll."
____
West
Virginians knows Cornbread
comes from corn and how to eat it.
_____
Every
West Virginian knows potatoes with eggs,
bacon, pork, venison, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; and that fried green
tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____
When
you hear someone say, "I was fishin
down by the crick" you know you are
in the presence of a West Virginian.
_____
Only
true
West Virginians say "sweet
tea" and "sweet milk."
Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and
lots of it -- we do not like our tea
unsweetened. Sweet milk means you don't
want buttermilk.
_____
And
a true West Virginians knows you don't
scream obscenities at little old ladies
who drive 30 mph on the freeway. You just
say, "Bless her heart" and go
your own way.
_____
To
those of you who're still a little
embarrassed by your West Virginian accent,
take a ride on our mountian Roads, say a
prayer for your safety. Bless your heart!
_____
And
to those of you who are still having a
hard time understanding all this West
Virginia stuff, bless your hearts,
I hear they are fixin' to have classes on
Hillbilly as a second language!
_____
And
for those who are not from West Virginia
but have lived here for a long time,
you'll need a sign to hang on your front
porch that reads: "I ain't from West
Virginia, but I got here as fast as I
could!"
And
those that are from West Virginia and
living away "Take me home, country
Roads"
_____
Bless
your hearts, ya'all have a blessed day!!
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